N E W Y E A R S ( V ) / ( S P ) I R A L

by blacktrash&treasure

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1.
plastic moments coat our lungs in caustic herculean swathes the hands that choke us cause no harm (so say them preachers in cue) but that's news to you - you're relegated to the back of the room with a crooked eye stare, a clear loon. standing staring at the rust-laden gloom a siren pierces the air your head is busted in two but - are you dehumanized? "yes i am" well, aren't you wondering why? "yes i am" so are you gonna speak up? "no, no, no" well then you must believe they're here to help. "no, i don't think so" are you imbued with pride? "no, no, no" have your ethics all been compromised? "yes they have" but are you trying hard to make your life? "yes, i am" then - say, "need me money for my health" say, "need me money for my tomb" say, "need me money for my home" say, "need me money , oh it's true" "when i get out of here, i'm never coming back. i know my role, it ain't no shell to be cracked. i just want to sit down, get high, and get down." hello, welcome to the land of the plentiful: lots of debt, lots of crime, lots of chemicals hello, welcome to the land of the plentiful and - say, "need me money for my drugs" say, "need me money for my food" say, "need me money to stay warm" say, "need me money to go to school" say, "need me money for my health" say, "need me money for my tomb" say, "need me money for my home" say, "need me money, oh it's true"
2.
keep yourself going humming hymnals to a god that you don't believe in - what do you have to say for yourself? and of those youngins once running around your legs - do they follow you like mistakes, or are they asking why daddy's behind bars (but are told they're not old enough to have it explained to them yet)? her limbs are frigid you cast your arm across her shoulder blades, but she withdraws she says she wants to go she says it's wrong you tell her not to cry as you unhook her bra it's just another low-down dirty touched umbilical the intersection of related flailing paw and the gaping maw of no good common criminal - why we say au revoir keep yourself going with them photograph fascimilies of family vacations on an island keep yourself going with them phone calls to women down in texas who've never seen snow keep yourself going with your new life, take solace in the fact that she'll never have to know what you've done
3.
brother of mine, you told me all i do is cry and that i have not the fortitude to stumble through life - it's true, i find it hard to face the day with a smile. my first memory is from when i was three, before our father went to prison for reasons of which our mother wouldn't speak; he stood there, laughing, as you took my toy... it's no wonder i've had trouble being one of the boys. do you remember, when i was about ten - you went around our neighborhood, told our friends chad and evan i had a microscopic penis? it was so humiliating...no wonder i've discovered the fine art of barricading myself into a room, with a book and doctor who on vhs loop...and though it's true that even as a kid i was never that masculine - next time you call me a bitch, remember who's fault it is put me down, beat me up / i can't speak, my tongue's stunned - did you ever stop to think of what you were doing to a young mind? every brother's unkind sometimes, but most show love (too). do you remember that night in the garage i told you i was suicidal, that i thought myself a lost cause? you said that if i ever killed myself you'd chase me down through the very depths of hell - you'd bring me back and you'd beat my ass for leaving you...and, well, the fact that you perceive my impending death as less a threat to me than as a chance to have the damned fantasy that there's nothing you can't beat - it proves the truth delusion moves through our family's genes. it seems i need to leave immediately and clean my sleeves of The City.

about

W E L C O M E T O T H E C I T Y -

in a virtual world where the simulations are unaware of reality's synthetic nature, a bizarre event triggers a glitch that resets
The City's
clocks and citizens (sans the youth and a homeless loon) back to august fifth, 1985.

F O R B E T T E R C O M P R E H E N S I O N O F M O T I V E -

a three piece companion to pt. I of "day 10498" from the new multimedia series, "august fifth, 1985", in which we begin
dissecting the psyche of each male in the daniels' household, -
the father AI,
the eldest trigiday trust, and
the timid youth silverfish shaker.

F R O M T H E H A N D C O N N E C T E D -

available january first:
physical copies come in a hand printed, hand painted case, packaged with pt. I of "day 10498" printed on cardstock.

credits

released August 5, 1985

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about

hailey & the black trash Grand Rapids, Michigan

a genre hopping multi-instrumentalist, hailey aims for an exegesis soaked in synthetic swirls, delivered in harmony with glitched-out guitars and analog bass booms. h.'s blend of electronica, hip-hop, and musique concrète, typically recorded on a bedroom mattress, is guaranteed to make you either scratch your head or begin to bob it. ... more

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